I
mean you have seen the way men drive in Nigeria: fast and furious, in a
hurry to get nowhere! Might it be that the way a man drives is a
reflection of his bedtime activity? And, of course, I also wanted to
ask: Is the lack of good séx driving women to fat in Nigeria?
You
must have seen the scene before, where, after copulating, the man
looked like the cat that got the cream, while the woman looked
despondent and was busy searching under the pillow, the bed and in the
wardrobe: for her orgasm!
Anyway,
added to the above is the rising incidence of rape, marital strives and
divorce due to adultery, which further underlines the problem. Every
day, you hear of some woman killed by an irate husband because of this
issue.
For
God’s sake, what is the fun in forcing a woman to have séx, or by rape?
Why would you date rape or even rape your wife? The real joy is making a
woman want you — just you — again and again.
The problem
It
seems that one of the biggest problems men face is knowing how to make
love to a woman! Unfortunately, what commonly happens is that young men
get their séxual advice from friends or from pornographic films and
books. As a result, they have a distorted view of what it is actually
about.
We
need to re-educate men about what it means to love a woman. Sadly, of
course, I am not an expert on séx matters and these articles are to
inform, educate and, maybe, even to just brighten up your day.
Here,
for your reading pleasure, is the synthesis of ‘How to make love to a
woman’ from women’s point of view. This is what women want.
Love-making, not séx
The
first thing men need to know is that women prefer to call it “making
love.” ‘séx’ sounds like a question and is very clinical. séx? Oh yes, I
am female! Thank you very much. So, this article is not an exposé on
séx. If you want séx, then please see the girls on Gimbiya Street in
Abuja. Or sort yourself out!
However,
if you really want to know how to make love; if you want the woman to
say, ‘Thank you’ afterwards or to come over the next time, seemingly
having forgotten her knickers at home, then you should follow a proven
system that is guaranteed to give pleasure to a woman.
Communication
Communicating
your interest and intentions is very important. Ensuring that the woman
of your dream knows that you care about her, and want her, is
important. However, talk is also cheap, unless followed by good
intentions and action. Communication can also be subtle and non verbal.
A
lot of Nigerian men do not engage in making eye contact, holding hands,
smiling, winking, stroking, cuddling, kissing, laughing, embracing,
etc.
Intimacy
Never
forget that making love is a whole body and mind experience. Cuddling,
hugging and just being close together reassure women and promise safety.
Women say that a good number of men are selfish partners who tend to
initiate séxwhen it suits them and have little or no thought about their
partners. Some women go through with it perfunctorily, as a duty.
Focus, timing, location
Planning,
timing, focus and the right location are important. A woman will more
than likely agree to have you if privacy is assured. Choose the location
carefully, communicate the idea early and allow her to simmer — just
for you. For most women, séx is in the mind: A woman needs to make love
to you in her mind first.
Use protection
This
is important and goes without saying. An annoying trend noticed among
Nigerian men is the fact that they won’t buy their own protection
(condoms). Why would you put your woman to risk? Part of the protection
also includes your personal hygiene. Hygiene is important to women.
Hygiene includes a bath, clean noses, ears, trim nails and clean shave
(including the armpits).
Also,
please wash your hands before touching a woman’s privates to avoid
transmitting infection from car doors and household things.
Pleasure and fun
Take
your time and really enjoy every individual sensation. That is how
women do it. You need to learn how to listen to a woman’s body. It will
tell you what she wants, just like yours tells her. Take it slow, so
slow it hurts. It is rare that a slow pace will bore a woman.
Ensure mutual fun
The
goal of séx is not just your orgasm but ecstasy for both partners.
Love-making is not a movie set where everyone concentrates on his/her
script. You do need to listen to her body — that is the most important
thing.
While
it is nice to occasionally focus on her exquisite spot, keep moving,
doing things with your tongue and hands all over her. However, do not
feel the need to work towards an orgasm, and do not lose your confidence
if she doesn’t come every time.
Post-intercourse
Some
women like to talk after séx and some don’t, so follow her cues. Talk
to your woman, express your pleasure, praise her prowess, subtly point
out any shortcomings and teach what she may seem to lack — so that she
keeps getting better for you.
This is also the best time for cuddling. Most men hate this part, but many women only have séx at all to get to this part.
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